Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
