So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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