that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just got carded by a ten year old.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
