nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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