just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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