You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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