he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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