I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Did I show you my penis last night?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
