I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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