dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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