If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
