you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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