Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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