im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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