half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
