sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
