the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
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