I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
