dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Randomize