He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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