Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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