look no pants
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
