I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize