The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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