omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
