i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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