Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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