i think i have herpe
just one?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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