Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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