Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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