After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize