So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
it's great music for shaving your balls
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Why are your pants in the freezer?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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