i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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