i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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