okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize