You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize