why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
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