Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
