She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
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