It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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