the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
My butt remains clenched, sir.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
