hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not ubering you a puppy
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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