Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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