i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
