THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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