i just had sex bonerless
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
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you will always have a special place in my vag
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
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I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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