Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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