what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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