He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
