mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize