at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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